Monday, July 23, 2007

And The Winner Is...

Here's the emptied tiny animal jar, now full of tiny names....


See? Tiny names.....


Here's the little boy who shook the names and pulled one....


Can't see it?


How 'bout now? (I know, it's blurry. The boy moves. A lot.)


It's Moxie! Also known as Sadly Blogless Lindsey!

Congrats Lindsey! Email me (Ruth AT 5elementknitr DOT com), I'll give you a couple of options to choose from.

Massage Monday:

Slight break from massage tips today to bring you a massage story...

So there I was...
Here's the story of the meanest bitch I ever worked on. The high end resort I worked at in Tucson got more then it's fair share of high-maintenance people but even high maintenance isn't generally mean.

She was an older woman (late 50's? it was hard to tell with all the plastic surgery) and wanted a deep tissue massage. She was able to take really good, deep pressure and she was a talker. (I always let the client lead; if they want to talk - no problem, want to be quiet - equally fine.)

Her: All the spas in Phoenix have been renovated, blah, blah, blah. There's some restaurant we want to go to but we can never get a reservation, blah, blah, blah.

Me: Oh, do you live in Phx?

Her: No. We have a house in Phx. We live in L.A. [CA]

Me: Oh, really? I grew up in Fresno.

Her: I don't know Fresno.

{OK, here's where I was going to say "It's up north." I got "It's" out before she cut me off to finish her sentence, so it went a little something like this....}

Her: I don't know Fresno {"It's"} and I don't care to know, frankly.

Before I could stop myself I said, "Wow."

Her: What? {She was asking as though to say, "Did you find something?" completely oblivious to my incredulity.}

Me: Oh, nothing. I just found a big knot. {It's above your neck, yoooouuuu bitch.}

She continued on with her "conversation" but I didn't even try engaging anything other then the monosyllabic "Yes." "No." here and there. She obviously didn't want to hear anything from me! The stupidest thing is that she started the conversation! And then basically told me, "Shut up and get back to work, you hired hand."

I'm high school enough that when she was still prone (which is where she was when this went down) and I had a free hand here and there, I was using it to flip her off. Also, I told her I was going to work on her piriformis and it might be a little intense. It's a muscle that runs from your sacrum to the head of your femur, deep to your glutes. It's intense in the lightest of situations. I was pinnin' the spoiled, sense-of-entitlement broad to the table. At one point she said, "OOH!" (as in OUCH!) and I asked, "Too much?" She said a little, so I didn't change the pressure and said, "How's this." "That's fine."

Stupid girl!

Good times, Ruth!

6 comments:

Yarnhog said...

Possibly my biggest pet peeve (and my pet peeves are legion) is rude people. My father is simply the rudest and nastiest person I've ever known, so there may be an issue there. I am naturally extremely polite and careful in my choice of words, but if someone is rude to me first, the gloves come off so fast you can barely see the blur. I don't think I'd have been as restrained as you were, although I do appreciate your application of unnecessary pain.

Chris said...

Congrats, Lindsay!

Damn. Heh, can't blame you for the "too much?"

Anonymous said...

Oh, to have been a fly on the wall...

Ang said...

what a cow!

well done Moxie!

knitnzu said...

Ahahaha that is funny...well, too bad you had to put up with her. I can't believe the way some people are. I'd love to see her in somebody's circumstances for the day...let her drown in seeing the world from a different (and not so lofty) perspective. Congratulations blogless Moxie!

Anonymous said...

Hi there! Thanks for giving me the link to your blog - aren't contests fun?