W is for Will

I'm likin' the Ravelry. I know some people have had serious problems with it but I tend to stay away from most of the groups I'm in and thus am able to avoid quite a bit of drama. I do participate in a few - I think 3 or 4 of the 40+ where I'm a member. I mostly join the groups as a way to show the things I'm interested in. I never read the weekly newsletter the Rav staff post.

A friend told me that this newsletter has an obituary column. I looked at it. Once. It told of a young woman losing her fight with cancer. That was enough for me. It was so depressing.

HOWEVER.....

That didn't stop me from acting like a greedy, callow, shameless wool pig and taking a peak at her Ravelry stash page.

I know.

I suck.

but I couldn't help wondering what would happen to her yarn! It was some pretty good stuff, too.
I know.

I suck.

Then it occurred to me that Dave would have no idea the value/worth of my yarn should something happen to me. Whether I went quick and unexpected (I avoid stepping in front of buses whenever possible but I usually have my head in the clouds and am not prone to paying attention) or slow and terrible for everyone (I'm hoping for the bus to show up), he would have no clue as to the worth of those 10 HUGE plastic bins in the basement. This is mostly because I keep him in the dark as to my addiction and it's costs (Hi, my name is Ruth and I'm a knitter.... hi Ruth).

So.

I propose we all make yarn wills. Now. I'm even going to make it a contest. Seems I let my 2 year blogiversary go by without so much as a 'by your leave' and I'll remedy that here. I'm even making it two constests!

Contest The First...
I want us all to make Yarn Wills. I want us to do it now and spread the word to all knitters. I suggested to the Rav staff to have another section on our Rav pages to make this easy. Maybe while filling out our stash info, there'd be another box to put in a value per skein should something happen to us. It would be a secret and would only be made available to public eyes should our names ever hit the obituary section (that way vultures like me wouldn't be hitting us up to sell our stuff when we're still breathing, y'know?). They filed it in the suggestion box and I never heard anymore about it.

So here's the contest. Make a Yarn Will. It doesn't even need to be all that specific - who gets first dibs, what to sell your remaining stuff for and what goes to charity. Also, you might want to either make it a special box on the sidebar of your blog or print a hard copy and keep it with the rest of your important papers so people know about it. Come back here and link to your Yarn Will (in the comments).

Spread the word - I think if anyone out there has more then 10 balls of yarn in their possession, they should have a Yarn Will. If anyone links their Yarn Will here (in the comments) and says they were sent by you, you'll get another entry. For this contest you don't have to be on Rav or even have a blog! If you don't have a blog, then type it out and email me a copy (email is under my pic) - just don't forget to make a hard copy for yourself and put it in a fireproof box with the rest of your important papers. I've also started a Rav group about this. I think it's very important and it would help out our families when they'll need some help dealing with our S.A.B.L.E.'s. when our S.A.B.L.E.'s actually outlive us.

Contest the Second...
We need a button! If you make a button for blogs and/or a banner for the Ravelry group (it's here), email it to me (addy is under my picture). Please put Contest in the subject line of the email so I don't accidentally lose it to junk mail. Donna is co-moderating with me in the Ravelry group so we'll be the judges.


The prize? Yarn! Of course! I have a lovely skein of sock yarn I'm going to let go of - I haven't decided which one but I will likely take a color suggestion from the winner. Also a Stitch Saver or two (also, of course!). I'll see how many entries I get. If it's over 50, I'll pull another skein or two of something from the mountain.

I know it's weird to contemplate one's own death (and weirder yet, to plan for it) so I'll go first....

First and foremost, this will takes precedent over any previous yarn wills I may have scrawled out either here on the blog or in a notebook somewhere!

Lisa Litton (skirtfiend on Rav) gets first dibs on my yarn. She is the one who taught me to knit! Then Rachel and Donna get a crack at it. Hopefully between those two and their organizing skills, they can set up a good sale for the rest of it!

Here's some guidelines to pricing....
Sock Bin - $20/skein ($10 for small skeins)
The Good Stuff Bin - $8/skein
Cotton Bin - $5/skein ($10/skein for anything over 200 yards)
Wool Bin - $6/skein ($10/skein for anything over 300 yards)
Novelty Bin - $1/skein
Acrylic Bin - $2/skein
Gift Knitting Bin - $7/skein
Kitchen Cotton Bin - $1/skein
Laceweight Bin - $10/skein
WIP Bin - That's a tough one.... I'll let them sort it out whether to frog and sell or donate.
Books - $10 each
Magazines - $3 each
Needles - if any get past the first dibs girls - $10 each for addi's, $5 each for any bamboo, the sets will go to the dibs girls

Whatever doesn't sell, donate!

OK! See how easy that was? Now it's your turn....

Contest deadline - 4th of July should give us plenty of time, right?

Hoping to outlive the S.A.B.L.E., Ruth!

P.S. For newbies, S.A.B.L.E. stands for Stash Acquisition Beyond Life Expectancy.

G is for Giving

I'm always amazed at the generosity of the knitting community. Someone has a birthday or a blogiversary and they give gifts instead of expecting to receive them. The amount of charity knitting around the web is profound. There are people who give up money and precious knitting time to speed knit a shawl for a wedding or a blanket for an approaching birth. Hell, kmkat alone has made more knitwear for preemies and Afghans then anyone I've ever seen! I think she's trying to make one for everyone in the world. If anyone can, she can!

I had a contest awhile ago that I'm severely overdue on handing out the prize. Sorry about that. The stars haven't lined up just right to get the numbers into a hat and get the boy to pull one.

I want to thank everyone who participated in T's class project. Traveling Trevor had the best time on his travels! He went to 3 places in Massachusetts, 2 places in Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Arizona, Virginia, 3 places in California, Georgia, Wisconsin, Maine, Ohio, Kentucky, North Boston. He traveled over borders into Canada twice, and over oceans into Israel and New Zealand! He saw many wonderful things and learned quite a lot.

I made a scrapbook of the pictures and souvenirs and the places he went. It was a big hit in his class and I couldn't have done it without all of you!

Here's the winner of the contest......

RatBags Mom in New Zealand!

Now, I don't know if she actually knits. If not, then her prize will be a handknit hat/scarf set in her favorite color. If she chooses the handknits over the unknit skein of yarn, I'll have Trev pull another number tonight to see who gets the yarn.

Speaking of giving...
There's a raffle going on here. The prizes are outstanding! Give and give big. It's a great cause and I know how knitters love a great cause with great prizes! And give quickly, I think she's pulling the winners sometime btw now and Valentine's Day (which is just 8 days away!).

Giving a hand and a skein or two, Ruth!

Contest Update

I started a Traveling Trevor Contest a coupla months ago. I posted that the deadline was to be the last week of November since he had to turn it in on December 1st.

We've been having so much fun with it that I've decided to extend the deadline. We won't be taking anymore contestants. Over 20 people signed up and the snail mail is taking much longer then anticipated!

Yesterday, we turned in the pic's and souvenirs and such that we had (I bought a scrapbook, people!). We'll continue to add to it as things come in.

The new deadline is December 31st, then no matter what - Trev will pull the winner's name from a hat on New Year's Day!

Thanks to all who signed up to help with this project, Ruth!

Traveling Trevor Contest

My oldest son has a class project he needs to complete. Here's the notice he came home with:

Dear Friend or Relative,

Hello! I am participating in an exciting learning project with the other students in my class in Parker, CO. We have read a funny book called "Flat Stanley" by Jeff Brown. The book is about a young boy named Stanley who is accidentally squished "as flat as a pancake" when a bulletin board falls on him. Stanley is very, very flat but otherwise fine. The story goes on to tell how Stanley discovers some real advantages to being flat. He can slide under doors, go down into sidewalk grates, and even fold himself up small enough to fit into an envelope and be mailed to California for an exciting vacation.

My classmates and I are sending out plain paper dolls that we call Flat Stanley [or for the purpose of this contest - Traveling Trevor], and we are sending them off to visit cities all over the world [T has specifically requested Hawaii, if anyone can help with that]. I have selected you to be Flat Stanley's "host" and hope that you will send him back to me after a short visit telling us (my class) something about your city and the exciting things Flat Stanley saw or did while he was there. We would also appreciate it if you could let us know approximately how far your city is from Parker, CO. so that we can calculate the number of miles Flat Stanley has traveled. (Using the website www.symsys.com/ingram/mileage.html is a quick easy way to calculate mileage.) If Flat Stanley finds any souvenirs while visiting your city, such as a postcard or bumper sticker, he would love to share them with my class. Of course Flat Stanley would also appreciate it if you could "dress" him to reflect the season you are in, or an activity that he did, or other clothing that would tell us more about where you live (and take a picture with him!).

Thank you for letting my Flat Stanley come visit you! Would you please make sure that my Flat Stanley gets home by December 1, 2008? Thanks again!

Sincerely, T

My idea is to send this to as many places as possible, have people fill out the form and take pic's with the paper doll and then send it on to the next person on the list. So here's the contest:

How To's:

1. Send your mailing address and email address to my email (Ruth AT 5elementknitr DOT com). Put Traveling Trevor in the subject line as most of these will go to my junk mail. DO NOT put your addresses in the comments or anywhere else on this blog.

2. I will email you the form to fill out and after you receive the paper doll, you can fill it out and send it back to me by email (preferably in an attachment).

3. You will also be asked to take pic's of the paper doll somewhere in your town (backyard with the pets/kids is fine, but we're looking for points of interest in your town, no matter how small or large!). Email the pic's in attachment form, too.

4. Then you will have to send the doll on to the next person (I'll email you who that will be).

5. If you have any "souvenirs" to send, I'll send you my address so you can mail them directly to T instead of having to try to pass them on to the next host and the next and the next, etc.

Time is of the essence here - This project is due on Dec. 1 which means I'd like all of this to be finished by November 28. So that's the deadline - November 28 (the day after Thanksgiving). That deadline is for Traveling T to come back and be done. Please DO NOT sign up if you can't get your turn and kick it back in the mail within a day or two of receiving. We don't want Traveling Trevor to get stuck anywhere!

I was thinking of having this all done through email (just posting the paper doll T decorates and letting you all print and go crazy) but I think that would be cheating as the assignment is to mail the thing around. ETA: If you want to participate and are not in the US, then by all means, I will email you all the stuff (including a paper doll) and you can still play so it gets done in time!

Entries:You will get one entry for completing steps 1-4. You will get a second entry if you complete step 5. I'll put all entries in a hat and let T close his eyes and pick the winner.

Here's the prize for this contest:


Pagewood Farm Yukon Sock Yarn; Colorway New Horizon;

Merino/Bamboo/Nylon (70/20/10); 450 yards

(A better picture can be seen at their site pagewoodfarm.com)

and of course, a Customized Stitch Saver

ETA - 2 : If you want to play and don't knit, I'll think of something special for a prize for you. Maybe I'll use this yarn to knit you something nice? Or I can also think of a completely unrelated knit prize. Due to my obsession with all things knitting, I'll have to think hard but I'm sure I can come up with something!

Now for someone else's contest. Sophanne is having a contest to show your favorite Halloween costume. For T's first Halloween, we went to a party for the kids in our playgroup. Dave and I were pirates and T was our parrot. We threw our costumes together and I made T's out of felt wings I cut out and glued some feathers to, a felt beak I cut out and attached to a red hat and a red onesie. My favorite part about these costumes is that it was Dave's idea!

T was about 5 months old....

I like this shot as it shows T's perpetual pouty lip he'd get when he was tired...

Paper doll mailing, Ruth!

Fly Bye

My FIL is in the hospital. He went in for a routine heart check on Tuesday and the EKG wasn't happy with him so they've admitted him. I'll know more on Friday but it's not looking good. He had quadruple bypass surgery 15 years ago and those bypasses are wearing out. He' 80 so he's not willing to have invasive surgery of any kind (valve replacements, shunts, etc.). The doctor is agreeing with him on that. Because of his age, weight, and previous surgery, he may not survive another surgery. They may try angioplasty but the doctor says that's a very short term solution to a very long-term problem.

It's so strange because he's in top spirits. He's his usual self and is cracking up the staff, enjoying the food services, the bed and generally having a great time!

I'll give more details on Monday when I know more.

For now - Sophanne has won the contest!

The Spring Fling was a rousing success again this year. We raised nearly $10,000 in 3 hours! The Silent Auction raised $6600 (with the Yarn Bouquet going for $100) and the rest of the event raised over $3000. We have a popcorn/cotton candy/pizza/soda/bake sale and then outside, we sell tickets for carnival games, a fake jail to put your friends in, a jumpy castle and a giant inflatable slide. We have this event and a Fall Festival and between these two events (and a couple smaller things we do during the year), the kids never have to go door-to-door selling crap no one wants (I'm looking at you $8 popsicle mold and $10 wrapping paper).

I've been woefully slacking on the blog front lately. I have no excuse other then stress. I've had many bloggable and exciting things happening here. I've not had a free weekend for over a month now! I even have a couple of FO's. I've even got pictures of most of these things! Stress. Killin' me. I need a massage!

Send good vibes to the FIL.

More soon, Ruth!

Meat Parade

Let's start this post with a reminder of my latest contest and the first entry I received....



The lovely and ever popular sophanne sent me this spectacular silvery stuff. That's 2 skeins of Debbie Bliss Pure Silk and one skein of Rowanspun 4 ply. It's roughly 400 yards of Fabulousness which gets her 2 entries in the contest (one entry per 200 yards). I was so excited when I opened the package but then I remembered it's for the Yarn Bouquet. sigh. It's for the children. (That was for you, Rachel!)

Last week we had a visitor. Our dear friend D'lynn came for a visit. D'lynn is the godmother to our kids. We love her and wish she could visit us all the time (as in, she should move here!). The last time she visited was 4 years ago!

She was able to visit to visit us on her way home to Arizona to visit her parents. When my husband was 12, his family moved to Wilcox, AZ. It's a tiny town with literally one stoplight. Still. He met D'lynn somewhere around high school and they've been friends forever.

So when she came to visit, it was a pretty big deal for us! We let the boys have a sleepover at their grandparents house (their first time doing this) and took D'lynn in to Denver for a night on the town.

First, we ate at this Brazilian Grill restaurant. Wow! What an experience! You have a small cylinder of wood that's painted into 3 sections - red, yellow, and green. The red is for when you want to go to the salad bar or when you "need a break" (as the waitress told us. Perplexed us initially but when flipped it, we understood). The green is for when you're ready for the meat and when you're finished with your meal and would like your check, you lay it on it's side which means yellow.

We hit the salad bar - 35 items! All your hot sides and all your salad stuff was over there. Along with the usual suspects you'd find in a salad bar, I had a tiny hard-boiled quail egg and some cooked yucca root. They had this really amazing paprika-colored mushroom gravy for the mashed potatoes, too.

Then when we were done with the salad bar, we flipped to green. Oh. Dear. God. The meat just kept coming! There were 16 different kinds and we tried them all! You have these little spork tongs at your plate and the meat guys cut off a thin slice of whatever they are carrying and you grab it with your tongs as they are slicing.

If you go to the restaurant link, you can see that they bring the meat to your table on these giant sword skewers with little plates underneath (to catch the juice). And they just. keep coming. We had rattlesnake sausage (which tasted like... sausage), buffalo meat, wild boar ribs (kinda dry), chunks of turkey wrapped in bacon, marinated chicken chunks, spicy chicken chunks (one of my favorites), some other kielbasa-type sausage, whole sirloin, garlic beef (D'lynn's favorite), some other steak tenderloin (Dave's favorite), ham with pineapple, whole tomatoes with parmesan (on a stick!).

Sheesh! At one point we had a meat guy on either side of the table cutting stuff and one waiting to have at us! There was one guy walking around with two really long skinny skewers. One had little tiny round somethings and the other skewer had equally small triangles of lime. We were on red at that point, trying to eat the meat on our plate and catch up for round 2! We flipped, just to see what the guy had - chicken hearts! (ew) We passed.

D'lynn and I couldn't get enough of the pineapple. It was rotisserie cooked like everything else and if you've never had grilled pineapple - it's so warm and juicy. We were absolutely stuffed and at the end of our meal. We'd turned the cylinder on its side to signal surrender, er, I mean for the check. But the ham/pineapple guy came around again and I told Dave, "Go green! Go green!" D'lynn and I found enough room for one more slice of pineapple each. YUM!

It was expensive as hell and overall very tasty. Dave and I had seen this type of thing on TV during a BBQ around the world type show. It looked so delicious and juicy! In real life, it was all just a bit dry. The steak stuff was rare and tender and juicy but everything else seemed kind of dried out! Especially the buffalo. It was like jerky! D'lynn said buffalo is really lean and cooking it like that probably isn't the best idea. And so much meat! I actually had a dream that night of meat swirling around on swords!

We went to Sweet Tomatoes (a salad buffet restaurant) the next day for some greens - to try and counteract all that meat. Whew!

After the meat fest, we went to Impulse Theater. An improv show - it was hysterical! We love those things. Last year, for Dave's b'day, he surprised me with going downtown to eat and then going to Bovine Metropolis (another improv show). Between the two, I liked Bovine better, it was a much more intimate venue. They had one Jeopardy-like game where the MC would give a category, someone in the audience would shout out the "answer" and the players would give their question. The MC said, "Small, dark and handsome." I shouted, "Colin Farrell" and the player, without missing a beat said, "What is a Colin in the wild." Love it!

We went to walk along the 16th Street Mall after that but it was dead so we went home. We were home by 10:30p. We're old.

I told D'lynn to pick something from my knitting books for me to make her and she picked this (Ravelry link). It's the Pimlico Shrug from Knit 2 Together. Good taste, right! And she bought the yarn from Purls of Wisdom for me to make it! It was about $120 and I asked if that was going to be OK. She said, "Are you kidding me? A beautiful sweater hand knit just for me? That's cheap!" You gotta love when they totally get it. I told her I'd have it done by Christmas. She also mentioned how cold it was in her office and her hands were always freezing, so I'll probably be making her some Fetchings, too.

Such a great time! Such a great visit! Such a dumb bunny I am as I took NO pictures. sigh. The visit was entirely too short. She came in Thursday night and had to fly off to AZ Saturday afternoon. She lives in Kansas and we hope she comes back really soon.

Missing her already, Ruth!

Yet Another Contest

My kids go to a great school. They have a few fundraisers per year and that way the children don't have to sell wrapping paper or other things people don't really want/need. There's the Fall Festival, the Winter Dance (which both my boys went to and danced The Robot all night long!) and the Spring Fling.

The Spring thing has a silent auction. My friend Rachel and I are on the committee to collect items for this auction. The mayor of our town is emceeing it this year so it should have a really good turnout.

Purls of Wisdom has donated a yarn basket with a pattern for a felted bag, the yarn to make it, needles and instruction. Yarnarts has donated a knitting kit.

I thought it would also be nice to have a big yarn bouquet to auction off. So here's my contest idea. Dig through your stash and send me yarn. Good stuff - I'm not normally a yarn snob but this is for my boys so snobbish I shall be (this time). Nothing you can get at the big chain stores.

For every 200 yards you send you will get one entry to this contest. What's the prize?

The Medallion Bag (that's a Ravelry link):

This pattern and enough yarn to make it in the colors of your choice! And, of course, the obligatory Stitch Saver of your choice!

My address is:

Ruth Moline

POB 3832

Parker, CO 80134

And the contest is open until May 10. After that I will have a drawing for the winner.

Fundraising fool, Ruth!

Contest Winners and Alphabet Challenge

First, I'm going to re-post about the Alphabet Challenge. Just so it will have it's own post. Here's what I wrote last week:

Alphabet Soup Challenge

You have to do the complete alphabet consecutively (as in "A is for.." "B is for.."). You don't have to do it every day but you do have to do each letter with no breaks in between for other posts. And they have to be legitimate posts. Can't be "A is for Apple" and then a picture of an apple, know what I mean? And they have to be done on separate days - no posting 26 times in one day. Once you've completed the alphabet, come back here and let me know. Or email me - my email is under my picture on the left.

I started this contest on March 12. Don't be discouraged if you're just now hearing about it as some people have started and already given up (I'm looking at you Olga - jk)

OK, the winners of my blogiversary contest are:

Heidi and Catsmum.

By my count, I used numbers in 26 of my titles over the past year. Kind of funny considering I just finished doing the alphabet. Maybe 26 is a theme? Nah. Just a coincidence.

With honorary mention going to ikkinlala for making me look up the definition for cardinal numbers. Ikkinlala - email me and I'll send you a Stitch Saver. (My email's under my pic.)

I've had a few requests to keep doing my Alphabet Soup. It was kind of tough! I'll probably make it a yearly thing. There were other things I would want to write about here and there but they wouldn't've fit in with the letter at the time.

So, we'll go on with our regularly scheduled blogging. Oh and tomorrow is yet another contest I'll be starting!

Contestarama, Ruth!

Y is for Year

One year Blogiversary! Splee!

So of course that means a contest.

A few months after starting this blog, I noticed that I used numbers quite often in my Titles. How many times have I done that since I've started blogging?

Correct answers will be put into a hat and a winner will be chosen. If I get over 50 entries, I'll choose 2 winners. Contest closes Monday, March 16, 9p Colorado Time. One entry per person.

Prizes will be of a fibery nature and, of course, I'll throw in one of my Stitch Savers.

BTW, my Stitch Savers have been featured in the new knitty.com! They are on the Cool Stuff page (scroll way down). Double Splee! You'll notice, I sent Amy singer (knitty editor) a plain one and a customized one with her name on it. Never hurts to suck up a little.

I'm also doing a huge spectacular contest. This Alphabet Soup thing has been pretty fun. Whenever I thought something for the next letter would be a challenge, something fortuitous would pop up! So here it is...

I will give a $50 gift certificate + $26 to the first person who completes the Alphabet Soup challenge. The G.C. will be to the LYS or online store of your choice. The $26 will be donated in the winner's name to the charity of their choice.

Alphabet Soup Challenge
You have to do the complete alphabet consecutively. You don't have to do it every day but you do have to do each letter with no breaks in between for other posts. And they have to be legitimate posts. Can't be "A is for Apple" and then a picture of an apple, know what I mean? And they have to be done on separate days - no posting 26 times in one day.

Ready, Set, Go!

Can't believe it's been a year, Ruth!

Good News, Bad News, Contest News

OK, I'm way behind. My contest ended on Sep. 15th and I'm just now getting around to drawing the names for the winners.

The bad news is...

I had a goal of 200 helmet-liners. I received 13. That's OK. It's not really bad news. I'm new and relatively unknown in this blog world we share and I'm happy to receive any!

The good news...

I've added a few extra prizes so everyone gets something! Now those observant people will see that there aren't 13 prizes. Some generous people sent extra liners and they will receive extra presents with their prize. (For pic's of the prizes, go here.)

OK...

The Fearless Fibers Wisteria went to BeckyKnitsToo already for being first.

The Fearless Fibers Peppermint Pink goes to Olga.

The Fearless Fibers Sand and Sun goes to My Blogless Rachel H.

The Fearless Fibers Duck Season goes to Throws Like A Girl.

The Knit2Together Book goes to My Blogless Rachel H.'s mom.

The Brown and Pink Bag goes to NoMoreSweaters.

The Black Bag goes to Gail. (Gail, email me with your blog so I can link ya!)

The Loop-D-Loop Book goes to knitnzu.

A Blue Project Bag (not pictured) goes to Nicole H. (email me!)

2 Skeins of Cascade 220 Eggplant Color goes to Janet K. (email me!)


Congratulations everyone! Please email me with your snail mail address and I will send the stuff next week. My email address is Ruth AT 5elementknitr DOT com.

I'll also be sending the helmet-liners next week. My good friend from high school who is an Army Major and stationed in Saudi Arabia has a good friend whose stationed in Iraq. His friend in Iraq is a female Army captain and..... a knitter! So I'll be sending her some knitting goodness along with the liners.

Thanks again to everyone who took the time to avoid their own WIP's and join my little drive. You guys rock! Thanks also, to Fearless Fibers for donating an extra skein to the prize pool.

Touched beyond belief, Ruth!

And The Winner Is...

Here's the emptied tiny animal jar, now full of tiny names....


See? Tiny names.....


Here's the little boy who shook the names and pulled one....


Can't see it?


How 'bout now? (I know, it's blurry. The boy moves. A lot.)


It's Moxie! Also known as Sadly Blogless Lindsey!

Congrats Lindsey! Email me (Ruth AT 5elementknitr DOT com), I'll give you a couple of options to choose from.

Massage Monday:

Slight break from massage tips today to bring you a massage story...

So there I was...
Here's the story of the meanest bitch I ever worked on. The high end resort I worked at in Tucson got more then it's fair share of high-maintenance people but even high maintenance isn't generally mean.

She was an older woman (late 50's? it was hard to tell with all the plastic surgery) and wanted a deep tissue massage. She was able to take really good, deep pressure and she was a talker. (I always let the client lead; if they want to talk - no problem, want to be quiet - equally fine.)

Her: All the spas in Phoenix have been renovated, blah, blah, blah. There's some restaurant we want to go to but we can never get a reservation, blah, blah, blah.

Me: Oh, do you live in Phx?

Her: No. We have a house in Phx. We live in L.A. [CA]

Me: Oh, really? I grew up in Fresno.

Her: I don't know Fresno.

{OK, here's where I was going to say "It's up north." I got "It's" out before she cut me off to finish her sentence, so it went a little something like this....}

Her: I don't know Fresno {"It's"} and I don't care to know, frankly.

Before I could stop myself I said, "Wow."

Her: What? {She was asking as though to say, "Did you find something?" completely oblivious to my incredulity.}

Me: Oh, nothing. I just found a big knot. {It's above your neck, yoooouuuu bitch.}

She continued on with her "conversation" but I didn't even try engaging anything other then the monosyllabic "Yes." "No." here and there. She obviously didn't want to hear anything from me! The stupidest thing is that she started the conversation! And then basically told me, "Shut up and get back to work, you hired hand."

I'm high school enough that when she was still prone (which is where she was when this went down) and I had a free hand here and there, I was using it to flip her off. Also, I told her I was going to work on her piriformis and it might be a little intense. It's a muscle that runs from your sacrum to the head of your femur, deep to your glutes. It's intense in the lightest of situations. I was pinnin' the spoiled, sense-of-entitlement broad to the table. At one point she said, "OOH!" (as in OUCH!) and I asked, "Too much?" She said a little, so I didn't change the pressure and said, "How's this." "That's fine."

Stupid girl!

Good times, Ruth!

2 Jokes and an Update

Hey, here's what I say when people have contests on their blogs for when they need jokes to feel better:

When I was in basic training, there was one really stupid joke that got me through. When things were especially tough, I'd start laughing out of the blue and drill sgt. would say: What's so funny, Riggs?

Me: Drill Sgt., why'd the bird go to the doctor?

Drill: Shut up Riggs, drop and give me 20 [or something equally brilliant]

This exchange would happen every few days for the 8 weeks I was in Basic.
Finally at Basic Training graduation, the DS came up to me and asked: OK, Riggs, why'd the bird to to the doctor?

I said, very simply, "He needed tweetment."
Told you it was stupid! Still makes me laugh.

Trev came up with a new joke all on his own:

Why did the toilet paper go down the hill?
To get to the bottom.


knit seashore asked about how the mat works out (in the comments of that post). You’re right, kss, it’s VERY washable, that’s why I made it, to replace the disgusting, unwashable rug that came with the house. As to it’s being slippery or not, I put a few smears of fabric paint underneath the four corners to make it grippy.
Swiffer cover patterns:
http://greenmountainmama.blogspot.com/2006/05/whiplash-color.html
http://hakucho.blogspot.com/2006/09/ball-band-mop-cover-pattern.html
http://smariek.blogspot.com/2007/06/my-first-swiffer-mop-cover.html
http://www.sheepofadifferentcolor.com/swiffercover.htm
http://www.sheepofadifferentcolor.com/swiffercoverknitted.htm

That's all I've got today. There's still time to enter the mini-contest. Entries taken til midnight tonight. I'll announce the winner on Monday.

See you then, Ruth!

100

THE CONTEST

THE PRIZES

Runs from June 1 - Sept. 15, 2007

_______________________________________________________

THE MINI CONTEST Runs from July 15 - July 20 (midnight), 2007

I'd like a link to your first blog post and your 100th (if you have one yet). If you don't have a blog, then give a link to the first memorable post that made you start reading blogs! The prize will be some mystery yarn and some baubles I've been making. One entry per person!

Wow, 100. I can't believe I've posted that much already. I only started this thing in March! Here's a link to my first post. I've been reading all of the entry posts I've already received and it seems to be a running theme. Either there's apologies ("I'm starting a blog. I know, I know, like we need more blogs...") or restarts ("I've tried this before but let's give it another go"). My first post has a little of both!

Things I've learned so far:

a) bloggers are NOT "imaginary friends", as my husband likes to call them. I've met several and they are wonderful!

b) bloggers are very helpful for life/knitting/computer tips and advice

c) some bloggers are thoughtless and mean because, apparently absence (and anonymity) make the heart grow colder (hasn't happened to me yet, but I've read about it)

d) I love writing (wait, I already knew that one)

I still have a lot of cleaning of the basement and the garage before the inlaws get here on Sat., so that's all for now!

I leave you with some yarn porn...

Plucky Knitter Sock Yarn - Thistle

And a shot or two of our little one. (The lights weren't on, it's just the flash of the camera making it so bright.) We went to check on the boys before bed and when we went to Davie's room this is what we saw...


Upon further inspection....

Our little guys love books!

Cleaning away, Ruth!

F'er

Flikr - I hate thee.



Does anyone know how to upload a batch of pic's to Flickr?? I spent an hour on Friday photographing all the yarn I have that's not organized in bins. Then I spent an hour and a half trying to figure out Flickr!! (Thanks Throws for the help and sympathetic ear. We still couldn't find how to upload a batch, though. sigh.) So far, I've found that you can drag/drop pic's, but only one at a time! That way lies madness, friends. I'm doing this so I can organize my stash on Ravelry. Once I got the pic's on Flikr and named them all, the Ravelry part its pretty fast and easy. But still, the whole time, during the whole process, all I could think was this small mantra:



I could be knitting now. I could be knitting now.



The good news is: Holy crap, I've got lots of yarn!!
The bad news is: Holy crap, I've got lots of yarn!!
The good news for others is:
a) my summer stash swap partner is going to get hooked UP
b) I'm having a mini-contest!



My next post will be my 100th!!



Send me a link to your 1st and (if you have one) your 100th post and I will enter you in a drawing for some mystery yarn and some bonus little baubles I've been playing with making. (If there's some type of yarn you are completely opposed to, let me know in your comment.) If you don't have a blog, send me a link to the first really memorable blogpost you remember that got you into reading blogs. This contest will close on Friday, July 20, 2007 at midnight. I will be picking a random number (actually, I'll have the boys each pick a number, then I'll add them together and divide by 3). (Just kidding!) If I get over 50 entries, I'll pick two numbers. (One entry per person.)



Here's an update on my slow TDF KAL socks...


Pattern: Baudelaire (knitty.com) Yarn: Claudia Handpaints Butter Pecan
Needle: Size 1 Addi Turbo

Massage Monday: short and sweet today, gotta give my life this week to Flikr and Ravelry (the inlaws leave Tucson, driving out here starting Thursday).

Sit in an unsoft chair (desk chair/dining chair, that sort of thing). Grab the edge of the seat between your knees with both hands. Round you shoulders and pull on the seat. This stretches your midback quite nicely.

On to my latest time-suck, Ruth!

How Nice For Us

Uberstrickenfrau sent me an excellent package! A few vintage knitting mags and on the back of one was this ad. A Boye for every girl. Indeed. Cause we all know how much every girl needs a boy! Ah, the sixties.


The full size picture shows four generations of women doing different needle crafts. What a nice thought. Too bad they had to go and insult these women with the slogan.


Here's more of what was in the package...

This one's the front of the ad




Here's the package as a whole. She included some squirt guns and some candy bars with a note that said I could distribute them among the kids (whoever I decided they were)...



More mag's....


This lovely card


And this leaflet...


With a suggestion for a KAL


Did you notice the prices??


The other mags range from 65 cents to $1.25 (for 65 patterns!). What fun! I was showing them to Dave and he was, of course, less then impressed. What does he know!

I also got a helmet-liner in the package! Yay! And another one from No More Sweaters! Good job, friends! Keep 'em coming.

The Contest. The Prizes.

Tour De France update: I didn't stitch a bit yesterday. On anything. sigh. On Saturday, I attempted the Figure Eight Cast On. Three times. You're supposed to have 8 stitches on each needle. I finally ended up with 8 on one needle and 7 on the other. I just added a stitch and kept going. Today, I'm going to switch them from the DPN's to a circular and attempt Magic Loop.

Massage Monday:
Stand next to an empty wall. You want your shoulder perpendicular to and about 4" away from the wall. Put your arm straight out behind you, with your palm flat on the wall. Turn your body away from the wall. You'll feel the stretch opening up your chest muscles. If you put your hand in a karate chop (palm down, thumb against the wall) instead of flat against the wall, it's the only stretch I've ever found that specifically stretches the bicep. You can also put your arm straight up, palm against the wall and slide your palm along the wall behind your body til it's pointing down. Rinse, repeat on the other side. If the stretch is too much, step a little further away from the wall, if it's not enough, get closer. Enjoy!



3 helmet-liners down, 197 to go, Ruth!

1 Down, 199 To Go

THE CONTEST

Runs June 1 - September 15

______________________________________________

Becky Knits sent the first helmet liner! Here's pic's of all the prizes. Becky, you get to pick which prize you'd like to have...

Fearless Fibers Sock Yarn: Yarn details: This is a top quality 100% SUPERWASH merino wool sock weight yarn. The gauge is 32 to 38 stitches to 4 inches on US #0-2 needles. The yarn was created and stored in a smoke-free/pet-free environment.This yarn comes in an extra-large 4-ounce skein, which is plenty of yarn for just about any pair of socks imaginable, including a pair of knee-socks or a pair socks for a very large man's foot!

Peppermint


Sand and Sun


Wisteria (This one's out of the running. Congrat's Becky!)


Duck Season (this is DK weight, I believe)


Knit 2 Together book






Some lovely handspun I scored on ebay.
Neither of these crappy photos does the colors justice. They are lovely spring greens/yellows/blues. Very light and pretty colors. The seller described the yarn thusly...
"four skeins of my hand spun merino wool yarn. I helped shear this sheep, and washed the wool, carded it, dyed it with Kool-Aid, and spun it and plied it. It is between a fingering and sport weight. The colors are delicate, blue and yellowish green.There are about 350 yards here, enough for socks or a wide lace scarf. Since it is hand spun the thickness of the yarn is not perfectly even."
(Did I just say "thusly"?? Is that even a word?)



This fantastic bag. I have one and found another one on ebay for this contest. It's the perfect size for knitting projects and the pockets on the front are quite handy! I am using mine as my regular purse now (of course, complete with a knitting project at all times!). It's chocolate brown and pink.


Another great project bag.
APPROX. DIMENSIONS :Laying Flat:13 x 10 x 3
APPROX. STRAP DROP :Built in Handle
INNER MATERIAL:Nylon


Another great book!






Let me know what you decide. Email me at Ruth AT 5elementknitr DOT com and give me your selection and your address. And thanks again for the great helmet liner!



On to Massage Monday:

How's your desk set-up? Are you back in your chair or on the edge of the seat? Are you feet able to touch the ground? (I'm 5'2" so that is usually a problem for me.) If you are at the edge of your seat, your back is in a constant state of contraction the whole time as it is keeping you from falling over. Bring a small throw pillow or a towel from home and fill the space. Your back will realize it can relax and you can eventually work your way back into your chair. I hate those pre-made lumbar supports. Every body is different and they are not adjustable. Besides, I'm all about the cheap and free and most everyone has throw pillows and towels at home.

As for not touching the ground, there are many small stools available for this. There's even this one or this one. Or, again, another throw pillow on the floor!

Please spread the word about my contest!
Thanks, Ruth!

Yarn on the Rocks

Chris has all the lines on contests. Yesterday she had a link to this contest where you had to guess what the Unlucky meant. The blogger said to leave a haiku or something and she'd pick one (not at random) to be the winner. Here's what I left in the comment box:

Sung to the tune of “Love on the Rocks” by Neil Diamond…

Lucky in love
Ain’t no surprise
Unlucky in yarn
Mixed up all my dyes
Got nothin’ to lose
So you just sing the blues all the time


Gave yarn my heart
Gave yarn my soul
Yarn left alone here
With tangles to hold
Yesterday’s gone
Now all I want is a swift


First I say I want you
How I really need you
Suddenly I find I’m unlucky
WIP’s are all around

When they know they have you
The skeins, they really have you
Nothing you can do or say
You’ve just got to knit, maybe crochet
We all know the song


You see what you need
You can knit what you want
Not much you can do
When the gauge is all off
May be blue skies above
But it’s cold when your
luck’s on the rocks

First they say you’re unlucky
You know you really ARE lucky
Suddenly you find you’re out there
Knitting up a storm


When they know they have you
The skeins, they really have you
Nothing you can do or say
You’ve just got to knit, maybe crochet
We all know the song


Lucky in love
Ain’t no surprise
Pour me a drink
And I’ll spin you some plies
Yesterday’s gone
And now all I want is more yarn….

So don't copy me, K?

Neil Diamond songs stuck in my head now, Ruth!

The Thing About Boys Is...

sometimes when they are showing you the owies on two of their fingers, they are also telling you to rock on....

And they are realllllllly serious about wanting you to rock on. I love his expression in this pic.

Thank you to Yarnhog and Uberstrickenfrau for the following blog fodder today...

I am most definitely NOT pregnant. Two reasons:

1. After we found out Davis was a boy (sonogram) and that Dave's aunt was the first girl in 100 years, we decided to stop at two kids. We also figured that after two, they outnumber you. Davis was born in May (2003) and Dave went in that October to get a vasectomy.

2. My period sneaked up on me this morning. I hate when it does that.

Too much information next, be warned...

I'd been on the pill since I was 17 but after Dave got, well, fixed, I stopped taking it (duh). After being chemically regulated for sooo long, I never have any idea when it's coming. Except that there are days when I feel like a raging bitch and then I suspect the period is near. But then, sometimes I'm wrong and it's just that I'm a bitch.

Also, when Dave went in for his vasectomy, well, first off, the Dr. told him I had to sign off on the form, too! Apparently they don't want to be held liable for some guy sneaking one in without his wife knowing.

It's kind of a funny story, the whole experience. (Maybe not as funny for D.) When we went to the initial consultation, after the talking part there was an... inspecting part. The Dr. told D to drop his pants (more diplomatically, of course) so he could have a look. (Still not sure why he needed a preview, but whatever.) Dave and I both looked behind D at the open blinds, the setting sun and the second story view of the parking lot and all the people below. D looked at me, I looked at him, we both shrugged and he dropped trou. The Dr..... inspected. Dave pulled up his pants and we left the office.

At the elevator, I couldn't help myself and had to ask, "So. Was he gentle?"

D: Shut up.

Me: Were his hands soft?

D: Shut. Up.

Me: giggle

The day of the procedure, we went in and D. got (had?) it done. It was a really quick, 20 minute outpatient procedure and after, we went to the elevator again. From another office comes this young woman. She had 4 kids under the age of six and another (possibly two more) very obviously on the way. She was hugely pregnant with 3 kids running around her legs, and one in her arms, his fists full of hair. One kid hit the elevator button, two more screamed, "I wanted to do it!!!! She looked at us calmly, smiled and shrugged. We looked at each other and smiled, both thinking, "Oh yeah, soo just did the right thing!" (I swear the vasectomy place hired her.)

Truthfully, though, Dave was a lot more ready to be done then I was. I still kind of wanted 3 kids and wasn't ready to be done with the whole tiny baby aspect of it all. About a year later, the last woman in my little kid playgroup to have her second child finally did. When it was my turn to bring food for her food parade, I went to visit. She had just gotten the sweet little girl to sleep and asked if I wanted to hold her (the baby, not the mom). I asked, "Are you sure?" and she said yes with a look on her face that belied the fact that it was more of a request on her part, not mine. I took the baby as gently as I could and sure enough, the little cherub woke up and started squalling. She let the baby cry for awhile, then took her back and popped her on a boob. It was at that moment that I knew I was OK with not having any more kids. As sweet as the child was and as much as I ached to have another while holding her (even while she cried), the look of bone-tired fatigue on my friend's face... I knew I was done. I was 34 by then and realized, I too needed some sleep.

Besides, we got perfection twice, why mess with that?

Alright, as promised more prizes for the contest...

This is a great book and since I hate when people talk about a book and only show the cover...

Also, this lovely hand spun I got on ebay...

Neither of these crappy photos does the colors justice. They are lovely spring greens/yellows/blues. Very light and pretty colors. The seller described the yarn thusly...

"four skeins of my hand spun merino wool yarn. I helped shear this sheep, and washed the wool, carded it, dyed it with Kool-Aid, and spun it and plied it. It is between a fingering and sport weight. The colors are delicate, blue and yellowish green.There are about 350 yards here, enough for socks or a wide lace scarf. Since it is hand spun the thickness of the yarn is not perfectly even."

(Did I just say "thusly"?? Is that even a word?)

I haven't, as of yet, received any helmet liners. To sweeten the pot a little, whoever (whomever?) gets me the first one, gets to pick which prize they'd like.

Going to practice my grammar and syntax, Ruth!